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Monday, November 27, 2006
the shadow cast in the sun was quiet.. inanimated.. dead...
at midnight, they come alive.. a glimsp of somethin dark ran past.. the figures that darted away in the mirror, the sensation of being watched.. are juz them.. the shadows u cast..
they watched, they waited, they whispers..
u lie alone in ur room in the dark.. u pull ur blanket up, tryin to keep out to cold, the feeling of being lost, the monsters in ur head.. as u begin to close ur eyes, they danced.
wild n free they danced, the rhythm of the night, the song of everwood.. the spun, they jump, they flee..
the night stand stills.. no words, no sounds, juz echos..
echos of their presence, the dance, the spell..
u finally falls asleep
+++* they danced for a purpose.. they do not feel joy n happiness, or sadness and anger.. they are beings of the dark.. their laughters a hollow sound, their cries filled with no emotions.. they exist because they haf to.. juz like we exist.. they longed to walk under the sun, to basked in Apollo's gloriousness.. the night is a gift granted from Artemis for a service they rendered.. but even she despises them as the lowest beings, for they are not allowed to come alive in her presence, but only in the darkest corners they will stay.. they are creatures not unlike rats, for they flee at the first sight of anythin that comes in light.. only the sick and the weak they dared to be seen.. they consume as the darkness engulfed them.
+ [CyNz] remember agains + 5:07 PM
hihi... its been super long since i last log it.. guess i was too busy wit everythin..
u noe,.. for a relationship to stay so long it is realli difficult.. coz eventually u will noe that feeling towards the person changes.. sometimes the case happens when the other party no longer love u.. but cared deeply for u instead..
this kind of life im so tired.. the work pressure, hockey compettition n fyp and sch n tests n assignment.. plus relationship prob... how can i ever survive??
i saw someone i shouldn't c that night.. y did he appear? i dun understand.. all along from the first time we knew each other u were nv serious abt me.. who am i kidding? i was nv good enough for u.. n for that i noe that being wit u is impossible, i couldnt bear to look at u in the eye coz i was so afraid of being hurt again.. call me silly but the feelings n hope that somedae we will be together exist.. u r juz someone i will nv haf but i yearn for.. its hard to forget u..
i tot losing ur no was good enough a constant reminder of me forgettin u.. but now it seemed like i had no choice, for u enter n leave my life as though it is a hotel.. but u nv relaise that u r the only person i let in so easily. u asked me to stay that night, it was a hell lot for me to resist.. the only reason i left is becoz u nv asked me to stay.. n when u did, it was too late.. im scared.. im realli scared wat will i do or sae.. juz afraid.. u always make me feel afraid.. but nv as a whole person.
im wit someone now, n he cherish me.. he makes me feel complete.. he tries his best to be wit me.. though he didnt noe how to love me yet.. no matter wat, i will try to make the relationship works.. unless i felt that he realli do not haF the capability to love me one dae, i will leave... this is selfish i noe, but i am protectin myself.. i didnt wan to be alone again.. n i didnt wanna get hurt.. the pain is so great that no one can ease..
dear im sorri, i must confess that i am selfish.. i do not wan a relatioship whereby i will fall, or can fall.. i cared v deeply for u.. but i dunno whether its love, or will i ever love? im too scared to love someone.. coz eventually they leave.. one by one..
the hurt n pain i felt when my grandma passed away, my bro leavin me scarred me deeply.. n i juz dun wan.. nv wanted .. n will nv wan to be the party that will feel hurt..
i noe.. life isn't fair.
+ [CyNz] remember agains + 4:52 PM
