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Monday, April 24, 2006
we live in a v busy world.. a place where sometimes we missed out the v essential things of beauty n life even when it is thrown right in the face. events happens v fast and for some reason, more of us lost the abiliy to comprehend matters n situation. the harsh reality force us to deal wit life and does not allow us to rest a single moment. is it alive? a monstrous shadow eatin up ur v spirit.
these few days are consider a disaster. i nv seen the omen, the deep rumbling of the Earth, or the thunderous both from the sky. or perhaps i lied, i did see the forewarned but yet i pretended that i didnt. naturally, when i was slap outright to deal with the situation i wanted to run, to be deaf, to be blind. losing all connection with the world appeals to me greatly at that moment.
yesterdae, mom n dad quarrelled. it wasnt a small tiff, nor was it an arguement. it was a storm. the exchange of harsh words, screaming n shouting, n eventually, crying. haf u ever witnessed the terrible moments where u thought u pictured the worst, but saw the dreadful scene whereby ur father make angry threats to kill ur mother? ha.. it was not juz an drama series.
i drag my angry father away over the shouts of my mom. i pull him out of the hse and into the nearby blockz. strangly, i was the one who drag him. my bro was home at that moment, n i had nv seen him out of his room. when i was out wit my dad, i msg my bro to take a look at my mom, which i am not sure if he did.
yes, the storm is over, but it is not the end. i hope things will be alright.
lets tok abt other things. i went to new creation church wit my frenz on sunday. the preacher was pastor prince, a charming n charismatic fellow whu amuses his audience wit his words. the session was a good one but i did not felt that i was connected wit God so much as the eternal life service, or maybe it is becoz that it was my first time steppin into the church after so many years that my emotion soared. after the service we went to the children church to pick up a ger named stepie whom is a sister to my fren's fren. she is so shy when she saw me at first. i didnt wan to scared her so i keep my distance. after which when we were aving kunch at long john silver, she gradually warms up as she saw me makin hearts and stars wit the straws there. she's so cute n vibrant, a fresh new perception u will get when u observe her. eventually we 'stick' together.
i rem that i was juz commenting that i haf been puttin on weight and she said ' Jesus said no one is fat in His eye' . her words struck me. since when had i cared so much on appearance? to put on make up every morning, to think of an outfit to wear to sch everydae and to care so much on the opinion of other. i wasnt like that the last time. my gf commented that i haf change alot and when i asked her what was it that change n whether if it is a good or bad thing she didnt answer me.
seredipity. i found my restin place in the arms of God. He gave me the strength to face the truth and the wisdom to solve problems. i haf to admit, i hadnt accepted Him fully in my heart yet. but i had always known His presence is real and a part of me aches to return to His embrace.
+ [CyNz] remember agains + 12:01 AM
